Strength training your jaw is the latest dumbest craze in men’s fitness
I feel bad, because you’ve probably never heard of GigaChad, and it’s a better way to live your life, and I’m about to screw it up.
It looks like some kind of a budget gaming console, but it actually refers to a male, Russian model / trainer named Ernest Khalimov, who looks like this. The guy could raise a naked choke a redwood tree. In 2015, Khalimov’s physique was the subject of a project entitled âSLEEK’N’TEARSâ by photographer Krista Sudmalis. That normally would have been the end of it – Jack Slave shot in black and white in a bad mood – until the photos ended up in two very specific corners of the internet.
First, an anonymous Redditor posted the series in a bodybuilding subreddit. From there, Khalimov’s face and the entire Gastonian cadre became the inspiration for a meme on 4chan, the controversial online platform that started out innocently enough (she invented Rickrolling), but turned out to be is transformed into a not-so-subtle subculture for a motley team of hackers, outsiders, conspiracy theorists and activists on the alternative right.
The site is also home to a large number of “involuntary bachelors” (commonly referred to as incels), a network of misogynistic, misanthropic men – and we would be remiss not to point out, increasingly violent – who hate women who go ‘ t watch their way, and all the men who to have in their own way. These men have two archetypes of enemies: attractive and unapproachable Stacy, and Chad, the guy who tends to get along with Stacy.
Chad is a chiseled, undulating and ultra-masculine Casanova. If he goes to the bar, he comes home with a girl. Reddit and 4chan made up variations on the name and premise (if Chad is the alpha, who’s the alpha of all Chad’s?), Which resulted in the creation of Chad Thundercock, and ultimately, the GigaChad:
GigaChad’s avatar is Khalimov. When his photos arrived on 4chan, commentators wrote: âStemming from the Emperor’s geneticsâ¦ when in his presence, Chadlets naturally looks down to avoid eye contact and stutters when he addresses. straightâ¦ has no fear in his heartâ¦ is a born leader of men. â¦ Struggles to fit through doors due to the width of his shouldersâ¦ chin on which you could forge a swordâ¦ jaw so square it can be used to accurately measure right angles.
Part of the reason Khalimov became a 4chan deity is because he doesn’t have an online presence. The photos were sketchy at best, apparently rendered in 3D, and they didn’t link to a thirsty Instagram account with 13,000 Russian followers. Until Khalimov finally answered all the memes, âThank you for your kind words. Regards, average person. – there was no confirmation that it really existed. GigaChad seemed to have emerged fully formed, destined to aggravate lesser men for the rest of the time.
It would all be much funnier if the incel community did not perpetuate the rights of extremist men. Having said that, there is a lighter takeaways to have here. It has to do with GigaChad’s otherworldly cut of the face. No matter how much they may hate him, men can’t get enough of Khalimov’s jawbone. The whole situation going on around his cheekbones, chin and neck seems to be the hallmark of Khalimov’s hyper-masculinity. Biceps and thighs? We have already seen it. But the glass cut profile of that jaw? We are talking now.
The incels have a word for the work they must do to climb the socio-sexual hierarchy. Like The New York Times underlined last year: “[Itâs called] looksmaxxing: Improve your sex appeal through weight lifting, skin and hair treatments and even plastic surgery. And one of the main features they are looking to improve on in all of this looks maxx is the angularity of their jaws.
However, incels aren’t the only ones obsessed with jaw-building. The trend has firmly taken hold over the past year with “jaw trainers” appearing in Instagram or Twitter ads to anyone who buys even a jar of protein powder. Meanwhile, fitness influencers have convinced followers that snacking on a silicone ball all day long should be a crucial part of their workout.
Last spring, a Milanese model named Luca Marchesi, who has 1.6 million subscribers on TikTok, posted a video showing the “results” of training her jaw for two consecutive months. The response was somewhat mixed – some compared him to Alvin and the Chipmunks, while others asked for more information on how he achieved the look. One follower wrote: âWhich trainer are you using. I have the chin of the weak ass, I want to chisel it.
Marchesi probably uses Jawzrsize. Self-proclaimed “# 1 hands-free workout for your neck and face”, it’s a compact rubber mouthpiece that promises varying levels of resistance (up to 50 pounds) for the “57+” muscles around your body. jaw. What do you have to do? Eat on it while you are sitting in front of your computer. Itâs so easy. Jawzrsize’s site promises a “FULL FACE WORKOUT IN MINUTES” that will ultimately give you the sculpted face of your alpha male dreams. No more flabby cheeks, double chins or turkey necks.
The company was founded by Brandon Harris, who went to hospital with multiple head injuries throughout his adult life. There was a bar fight in Alaska, then a motorcycle accident in Hawaii, and each experience forced him to firm his face. Jawzrsize frequently refers to these incidents on social media with videos or photos of Harris in the emergency room. But while it’s understandable that a man who is used to having his jaw closed would be concerned about rebuilding, it’s not clear why he needs everyone, or how creaking in his product is going to offer you something. thing in holistic wellness.
As Robert Dodds, certified personal trainer and physical trainer, points out, Jawzrsize reformulates an age-old false truth about wellness: spot reduction. âYou can’t eliminate facial fat,â he says. âYou lose facial fat by following general weight loss principles, by being in a calorie deficit. Most people have more fat on their faces than they realize, which darkens their jaw definition. I would bet if you got slim enough to see abs you would be happy with your jawline definition as well.
Even if you accept the hypothesis that you could significantly increase the size of your masseter muscle (out of those 57+ facial muscles this is the main one at stake), keep in mind that when we think of a “chiseled” jawbone , we’re actually invoking the face structure. GigaChad’s famous “square jaw” is not a muscle, it is a bone – the mandible, which is the largest bone in the human skull. If you want it to be sharper or straighter, you shouldn’t be spending $ 45 on a chew toy. You should go for a run and cut back on your beer intake.
Harris, like so many other fitness influencers today, touts a return to “primitive life” as a key aspect of his diet. âOver the years, humanity seems to have completely forgotten about the primal bite,â he told his followers in an Instagram post. “It’s time we all got this back for the hundreds of benefits it brings.”
This idea is unfounded: our prehistoric ancestors tore up dense game cooked in a fire; we subsist on smoothies and fries. As we have become limp, so have our faces. But while some research has corroborated that jaw trainers “improve bite force,” the same has been confirmed for the chewing of Spearmint Orbit (which early hominids certainly did not have on hand). In other words, your chewing muscles are doing fine. You chew, talk, smile, and frown all day. The masseter and his associates are involved in all of the above.
All this obsessive search for the latest male imperfection is frustrating. You already had to worry about your father’s body and your man’s breasts and skipping leg day; now you also have to worry about your jaws. On Harris’ side, the gadget works. According to GQ, the brand recorded seven figures in 2020. As jaw training has increased this year and workplace fitness solutions have become more popular, it is safe to say that those revenues haven’t have only increased.
Good rule of thumb for life? If the incels are fixated on something, you better stay away. I tried the Jawzrsize. It gave me a headache. I also advise against trying other sneakers on the market. The founder of Jawzrsize’s main competitor, Chisell, once bragged about “all the girls at conventions” approaching him. âIt’s like having abs for the face,â he said. No of course not. It’s not well-being – it’s a side show that wastes time. Leave it for the men of 4chan. They’re the ones who sit in front of their computers all day, anyway.
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